Sales Tips for Solopreneurs Who Hate Selling

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What if selling didn’t feel salesy at all?

In this episode of The Aspiring Solopreneur, Carly and Joe sit down with the brilliant Nikki Rausch, creator of the Selling Staircase and queen of relationship selling. Nikki breaks down how to ditch the pushy tactics and build trust through smart questions, real conversations, and—get this—actually asking permission to sell. (Novel concept, right?)

She spills the tea on the biggest sales mistakes people make (yes, those cringey LinkedIn messages) and how to flip the script with connection-first strategies that feel genuinely good—even if you’re totally allergic to sales.

Oh, and she’s got thoughts on why every solopreneur needs a high-ticket offer (and how to anchor it the right way).

Whether you’re new to sales or just tired of the icky stuff, this one’s going to be your secret weapon. 

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Connect with Nikki Rausch

• Grab Nikki's free training just for Aspiring Solopreneur listeners at yoursalesmaven.com/aspiring

Favorite Quote About Success:"

"Blessed are the flexible for they shall not be bent out of shape."

Being a solopreneur is awesome but it’s not easy. It's hard to get noticed. Most business advice is for bigger companies, and you're all alone...until now. LifeStarr's SoloSuite Intro gives you free education, community, and tools to build a thriving one-person business. 

So, if you are lacking direction, having a hard time generating leads, or are having trouble keeping up with everything you have to do, or even just lonely running a company of one, click here to check out SoloSuite Intro!

About Nikki Rausch

​Nikki Rausch is the CEO and founder of Sales Maven, an organization dedicated to authentic selling. With over 25 years of sales experience, she has worked with prestigious organizations such as The Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation, Hewlett-Packard, and NASA, earning multiple top producer awards and shattering sales records across industries. ​

Nikki holds a business degree from the University of Washington and a master certification in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), which she integrates to enhance communication and sales effectiveness. She is also the author of three popular books available on Amazon and hosts the "Sales Maven" podcast, where she shares insights on sales strategies and techniques. ​

Through Sales Maven, Nikki offers various services, including the Sales Maven Society, strategy sessions, masterclasses, and VIP coaching options, all aimed at empowering women business owners to sell with confidence and integrity.

Episode Transcript

Carly Ries: Ever feel like sales is something you do to someone rather than with them? Well, our guest today, Nikki Rausch, is here to flip that script. In this episode, we dive into relationship selling, a strategy built on trust, smart questions, and genuine connections. Nikki breaks down her selling staircase framework, reveals why cold LinkedIn pitches are failing miserably, and explains how asking for permission can be the game changer in your sales approach. Plus, find out why skipping steps in a sales conversation can cost you clients, the one mistake even great salespeople make, and how to create high end offers people actually want to buy.

Oh, and did we mention she's giving away a free training just for our listeners? So don't miss this one. Your sales game and revenue for that matter will thank you. You're listening to the aspiring solopreneur, the podcast for those just taking the bold step or even just thinking about taking that step into the world of solo entrepreneurship. My name is Carly Reese, and my cohost, Joe Rando, and I are your guides to navigating this crazy but awesome journey as a company of one.

We take pride in being part of Lifestar, a digital hub dedicated to all aspects of solopreneurship that has empowered and educated countless solopreneurs looking to build a business that resonates with their life's ambitions. We help people work to live, not live to work. And if you're looking for a get rich quick scheme, this is not the show for you. So if you're eager to gain valuable insights from industry experts on running a business the right way the first time around or want to learn from the missteps of solopreneurs who've paved the way before you, then stick around. We've got your back because flying solo in business doesn't mean you're alone.

Oh, Nikki. I was just telling you this offline that I am so excited to talk to a sales professional because I'm always so intrigued by the different approaches, the different methodologies, and you have some really good tactics that people should use and just a whole methodology around it. So I just kind of want to dive right in because I'm so intrigued by the term relationship selling. Can you kind of talk about what that is and how it differs from traditional sales techniques?

Nikki Rausch: Yeah, so kind of the most basic way to explain it is I think a lot of times people think sales is something that you do to another person. And I believe and teach that sales is something you do with another person. So it's about having conversation. It's about asking really smart questions. It's about being a really good listener.

So from a relationship standpoint, and this comes from my background in neuro linguistic programming, where kind of the foundation, I don't know if you're familiar with that term, but if not, it's the study of communication, really. And I have a pretty extensive background in it. And the foundation of it is built on rapport. So when I think about relationship selling, and what I teach is you have to have rapport in place. So when you think about selling, and whether or not you have a relationship, there's a few key things, three things really to keep in mind is one, does this person have a need, or a want or a desire?

Do you have a solution that meets that need, that want or desire? And here's the third most critical piece, is do you have permission to put an offer in front of them? And if you have all three of those, like you're well on your way to closing that deal, but if you're missing that, then you're essentially wasting people's time and also your own.

Joe Rando: So you're telling me that those people sending me in mails in LinkedIn offering to asking me to hire them to do whatever are making a mistake. That what you're

Nikki Rausch: I'm I'm saying that is a huge mistake. It's such a rapport breaker, right? Like how annoying is it? And off putting is it when somebody shows up unannounced and immediately goes into, hey, Joe, here's all the things you're doing wrong. Here's why your YouTube channel isn't successful.

Here's why you could be better on LinkedIn. And oh, by the way, you should hire me. I would say that's the comparison of imagine somebody comes up to you and they got a piece of paper and they swipe it across your finger. And you you start bleeding and they go, oh, sweetheart, you poor little thing. You're bleeding.

I saw band aids. And you're like, yeah, because because you cut me. That's why. Like, I'm not gonna buy a band aid from you. You cut me.

Carly Ries: Yes. And I I I almost feel bad for these people because maybe their product or service is great. They're just taking the wrong approach. And this is actually a good segue into my last question. It's a or my last.

My next question.

Joe Rando: That was short.

Carly Ries: What's the idea for you?

Nikki Rausch: Get her out of here.

Carly Ries: It's a really bad first impression. So how do you create a positive first impression that establishes a real connection that people want to move forward with?

Nikki Rausch: Well, there's a few ways to do this. So as a solopreneur, I think a lot of times we're spending time networking, right? And that can be online and that can be offline as well. So when you think about your first impression, the first thing to do is take a step back and ask yourself, what is it like for somebody to engage with me the first time? So are they getting the, like what I call the word vomit approach where it's like me, me, me, here's all about me, here's why I'm so great, blah, blah, blah.

And people go like, oh, they push away a little bit from that. Or are you engaging them with a question? Are you are they leading in? Do they feel welcomed by you? And that happens on your web page that, you know, on your on your website, that happens on your social media posts, and it definitely happens in person.

And here's like an in person tip that's gonna be so basic, you might be like, duh, Nikki. But yet a lot of people miss it, is when you're introducing yourself, say your name. Oftentimes when you're meeting somebody, they'll be like, oh, hi, nice to meet you. And then now you have to be the person to go, and your name is? But if somebody would make it easy for you and be like, hi, it's so nice to meet you.

I'm Nikki Rausch. Now that person could go, oh, hi, Nikki. You know, I'm Carly or I'm Joe or whatever. But it starts the conversation of like, I'm gonna make it as easy as possible for you to engage with me and have a conversation.

Joe Rando: So we do live events, you know, for solopreneurs for free that they come in virtual events. And one time Carly said after probably doing, I don't know, 15 of these things said, you know, you really should tell them who you are before you start. Oh, yeah.

Nikki Rausch: Good point. Really good. Right?

Carly Ries: Because he has a name that and it's so comical with Joe Rando. Like, it could be a Joe Schmo or just is my real name. I'm the founder of Lifestar.

Joe Rando: Hashtag thanks millennials.

Carly Ries: Love it. Exactly.

Joe Rando: It was a perfectly good name until the millennials came along.

Nikki Rausch: Yeah. They ruined everything.

Carly Ries: Yep. Sorry about that. So you were talking about I like telling talking to salespeople because they have different approaches, sales experts like you. You have the idea of the selling staircase. Can you walk us through that?

Nikki Rausch: Yeah, so the selling staircase is my signature framework for a sales conversation, a successful sales conversation. There are five steps in it. And the reason I teach it as a staircase is because most people understand that when you're at the bottom of a staircase, you ascend at one step at a time. You don't stand at the bottom of a staircase and like hop to the top step, right? And you certainly don't walk up to somebody you really don't have like any relationship with yet and say, hey, hop up to that top step, would you?

But yet in sales, oftentimes we're skipping steps as the seller. And when you skip steps, you leave people feeling like confused, sometimes annoyed, and like, why would I do that? Like I might bang my shins or I'm not going to just stand it from a standing position, hop up to the top of a staircase, I'm going to go one step at a time. So when you understand that there is a structure to a successful sales conversation, and you know what step you're on, it makes it really easy for you as the seller to know what to do or say next. It also makes it really easy for the buyer or the prospective buyer to kind of follow along and be guided through the process.

You know, you don't, you never want to be the person who's standing outside the grocery store being like accosting somebody who's walking in, like buy my thing, you know, and it's like, oh my gosh, I'm just here to pick up some milk. What's going on?

Joe Rando: Unless you're a Girl Scout.

Carly Ries: I was just gonna say that now. Was like, they're the one exception rule.

Nikki Rausch: That is such a good point, Joe. And now they're getting, you know, like, it's it's almost girl scout season too. Right? So this is this is gonna be coming around. But the thing is is that we wanna just make it it easy for people.

And the easier you make it for somebody to buy from you, be in conversation with you, the more likely they are to like stick around and take the next step with you. So these five steps and I can go through them in as much details as you want. So I'll just say right off the right off the bat, step one is introduction. And we kind of touched on that, like, are you making a powerful first impression? Are you thinking about the impression you're making?

And is there anything you could do to make it more inviting to make it more welcoming for somebody? Step two is the most misstep in the sales conversation, and that's create curiosity. If you don't know how to create curiosity when you're talking about your business, the services that you offer, the clients that you work with, you'll actually miss out on working with some of your best clients because they don't know what you know, they don't know what's possible for them yet. We have to peak their curiosity. So that's step two.

And once you do that, before we even get to step three, oftentimes when you pique someone's curiosity, they start to lean in and they start to give you what I what I talk about is buying signals. Buying signals are verbal and nonverbal cues that people give that indicate interest. Sometimes a buying signal is like I'm ready to buy great, then you can skip steps in that case. I would say like, you can follow the client, you don't get to skip steps as the seller. But if the client's like, here's my money, sign me up, then okay, they've skipped the step to the close.

So step two, create curiosity, get a buying signal, move them to step three, which is what I I describe it as the discovery call, the discovery part of the conversation. Now you might call it the sales consultation or the consult call, it doesn't really matter what you call it. But the objective of this part of the conversation is to really understand, do they have a need? Do I have a solution that meets that? And do I get and can I get permission to put an offer in front of them?

And you do that by asking really smart questions in this discovery phase. And I always say there's two types of questions to ask. There's the right fit questions, and then there's your expertise questions. And the expertise questions is instead of trying to like convince somebody how great you are, you actually can ask really smart questions in this section that leads them to be like, my gosh, nobody's asked me that. And that makes me want to lean in and work with this person because they're asking great questions.

So once we've established they've got a need, I have a solution, and I'm going to now ask permission, I'm going to move them to step four, which is proposal. This is where you're actually laying out the offer. Now, depending on the type of business you have, this may require a formal proposal, but oftentimes it's just part of the conversation. And in the proposal step, that's where you stand in your place of expertise. And really, that's where the selling happens.

You're taking the information that you gathered in the discovery, and you're delivering back an offer that really speaks to their need, the things that they've said are important, their criteria. And then step five, which also goes very closely with step four, and frankly, is the second most misstep in the the sales process is the close. And that's where you're issuing close language. Now, it sounds like that means like closing the deal and oftentimes it does. But it also means that you have to attempt to close in order for that person to, I always say there's one of five things that happens when you close.

They say yes, awesome, you got a new client. Number two is they ask a question. And oftentimes if some part, if somebody has a question, you have to answer that question in order to earn their business. I had a coach that used to always say, Nikki, people are one question away from hiring you. And the piece that I add to it is you have to give them the opportunity to ask you that question.

You'll do that by issuing close because it'll bring up a question they might have. The third thing that'll happen is they'll voice an objection and there's ways to overcome objections. The fourth thing is they'll say no, that's going to happen from time to time, people are gonna, you know, decline your offer. And the fifth thing that will happen is they'll say, I need to think about it. And that happens a lot.

And there's things to do when you get that type of response. So those are the five steps, introduction, curiosity, discovery, proposal and close.

Joe Rando: I have a question. Because one of the things that, you know, and I'm not a sales expert. I did I was the world's worst salesperson and decided to study it a bit and have gotten significantly better. But and we can talk about why I was so bad on another time. But one of the things that I've come to understand, at least from myself as a buyer, is and I think it's implicit in your steps, but I just wanna kinda you maybe talk through it a little bit, but is that trust?

Right? So I'm dealing with somebody, and they can do all these things, but if if I don't trust them, I don't feel trust, then I'm really reluctant to wanna give them my money. And I just wonder, you know, where does that tie into in these steps? Where should you be trying to really build that trust?

Nikki Rausch: You should be building it at every step. And so one of the things that I talk about and teach is that the way that you move somebody from one step to the next is through an invitation. And when you're inviting people and doing it in the form of a question, you're showing that person, I respect you, I'm listening. And you're the adult here, you get to make the decision about where we're going next. So it's learning how to issue invitations.

And when you show somebody that you're listening to them, you're asking questions before you launch into your pitch, all of those things, it shows that you can trust me. I'm not here to just like hard sell you. I'm not here to shame you. I'm not gonna hear, you know, to paper cut you and push on your pain points. I'm here to understand do you have a need?

Do I have a solution? And do I have your permission? And by getting permission, it builds trust. If you think about it, Joe, I don't know if you would agree, but if somebody, you're having a conversation with somebody and you say something and they go like, Oh my gosh, I have a solution. He should totally do this.

Are you more apt to want to listen to somebody's solution when they say, You know, Joe, I might have an idea for you. Is it okay if I if I share it with you? Versus somebody saying like, Joe, you know what you should do? You should totally do this, this and this. And you're kind of like, should, don't should on me.

Like, I don't like it. But if they ask, hey, is it okay if I offer this solution to you? You're probably more inclined to wanna listen and it feels more trustworthy, right? Like, they're not gonna just like, bulldoze over me. They're they're showing me respect.

Carly Ries: It's funny because we have a monthly event for solopreneurs where they can help solve each other's problems. And our emcee every single month says, don't go shooting all over shoulding all over everybody because that's kind of people's first instinct. It's like, oh, well, you should do this instead. You should do this instead. And you're right.

That I've never looked at it from that point. I've always just said what George says, Joe. And but Nick, you said it so succinctly. Also on the topic of questions, I am genuinely curious about this curious about this. Why do you believe people should have high end offers?

Nikki Rausch: Okay. The reason they should have high end offers is because when you have a high end offer and you have other offers that sit below it, you give people this idea of choice. And as consumers, we like choice. So when you have a high end offer, and let's say that you have, like I would say, it's good to present somebody up to three offers, never more than three initially, because you'll overwhelm them and an overwhelmed mind does not buy. But if you think about what's that offer you really, really wanna sell?

And that frankly should be your middle tier offer. And then you create a high end offer that sits above it. That's what's known as an anchor offer. So when you're laying out your offer to somebody, you're gonna say, you know, there are three ways that you could work with me in a private coaching session. For instance, I have the all inclusive six month program.

It has this, this and this. And then I have the kind of the getting started package. And this is my mid tier and this is my most popular offer. This is the one you wanna sell by the way. And you talk about that.

And then you go, or if you just want to start with a strategy session, that's like the most basic kind of getting started thing. We could talk about that too. And you present it in what's known as top down selling. So you present your high end offer first, then your middle and then your bottom. Now what you're doing to the person who's in that decision making process, they're looking at it going, well, I don't like to have things taken away.

Like as humans, I would say like babies come out of the womb already knowing how to do something, grasp. Like if you're a woman with long hair, you know this because you hold a brand new baby and it gets a hold of your hair and you're like, I'm never getting that hair back. Like it's going with the hand, right? So we as humans know how to grasp and we grasp onto things. So So when you do top down selling, what you're essentially doing is saying to the person like, hey, if you're willing to give up these things, which most of us don't want to give things up, then you can save yourself money, right?

If you want to work down. But most people do it the opposite way. They start at their least expensive and then work their way up, which is essentially saying to the brain, you have to spend more to get what you really want. Versus like, hey, you give this up. And now they'll make a more educated decision that is a better fit for them because it's not all based on the money.

It's about getting the solution that is gonna best meet their needs.

Joe Rando: Question on that. That's really, really interesting. But with this premium offer that you really you said you you really wanna sell your middle offer. So does this premium offer, do you price it in such a way that pretty much nobody takes it? Or do you price it just to the level where you go, I'm I'm okay with that at that price?

How do you think about I

Nikki Rausch: price it to where if somebody takes it, I'm gonna be delighted to serve to serve it. I have actually made this mistake. Made this mistake about two years ago, I put together a really high end offer. It was my anchor offer. And somebody chose it.

And oh my gosh, it was so much work. And I realized later, like I probably undercharged by about $2,500. So so then I go, okay, Nikki, like if somebody sells if somebody says I want that, I should be delighted about delivering it, not feeling like, my goodness. That's gonna be so hard. So price it in a way that makes sense, that you will feel really good and excited to deliver it.

And it's a stretch, like it's a stretch for somebody to be like, I want I want as much Joe in my life as I can possibly get. I want to learn everything that I can possibly learn from you in the next six months or a year or whatever the program is, twelve weeks, whatever, you know, your high end offer is. You want to be delighted that they chose it and you want to be excited about delivering it. Otherwise, you're you're kind of doing a disservice, especially as a solopreneur because we get to decide about our offers, We get to price them, we get to decide what goes in the package. So build something you'll be excited to sell.

Joe Rando: Okay.

Carly Ries: Joe, I don't know about you, my wheels are turning right now. Yep. Either at a good time or not a good time. Well, Nikki, I like I said, this is all just so fascinating. It's funny because I'm one of the people that has always been afraid of sales.

I I don't like asking people for things. It's just not natural to me, but I am a natural relationship builder. And you marrying the two just makes it so much easier to approach. And I I think and I know a lot of our audience feels the same way. So I really wanna thank you for coming on the show.

But we cannot end it without asking you the the question we ask all of our guests. What is your favorite quote about success?

Nikki Rausch: My all time favorite quote about quotes and success is blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape. And I really teach and I believe that the more flexible you are in a conversation, the more influence you have. And the more influence you have, the higher your success rate. So it is about learning how to add flexibility to your behavior so that things don't, you know, they don't knock you off course, you don't have to get flustered in the conversation, and you can put the other person at ease.

Joe Rando: You know, something you said during this call was the idea of somebody says, yeah, I wanna buy. You're like, well, you can skip steps. And I have literally seen salespeople where it's like, I'm in. I want it. And then they make me sit there for another twenty minutes while they go through their it's like, what was what is the the saying?

If you made the sales stop talking, is that it?

Nikki Rausch: Yeah, it's called selling past the close. As soon as somebody's ready to buy, you take that you take the money.

Joe Rando: So being flex be flexible. And I got it. I love it. Great stuff.

Carly Ries: Love it too. Well, Nikki, we know you have a great podcast. You just have so much going on. Where can people find you if they wanna learn more?

Nikki Rausch: Well, can I wrap it around a gift for your listener? Is that okay?

Joe Rando: Gifts.

Carly Ries: Okay. You asked permission. Did everybody see that? Hear that?

Nikki Rausch: The permission is such a it's a it's a key critical thing for relationship selling. So I have a training I normally charge for it. It's called seal the deal. And I really dig into those questions that you should be asking in your consult. What are the right fit questions?

And what are your expertise questions? So I'll gift this to your audience, and they can get it by going to yoursalesmaven.com/aspiring. So this is specifically for your solopreneurs. I would love to give this training to you. You will walk away with a new way to ask questions and new questions to have in your back pocket to really convert your consultation calls.

Carly Ries: We'll take the You don't need to keep selling. We'll take it. Well, Nikki, thank you so much. That's very generous of you. Yeah.

Know Definitely. Will appreciate it. And we can't thank you enough for coming on today.

Nikki Rausch: Thanks for having me and for the conversation and the questions. Thank you so much.

Carly Ries: Of course.

Joe Rando: Thanks, Vicky.

Carly Ries: Listeners, you know the spiel. We'd love that five star review. Please subscribe on your favorite podcast platform, including YouTube, and we will see you next time on the aspiring solopreneur. You may be going solo in business, but that doesn't mean you're alone. In fact, millions of people are in your shoes, running a one person business and figuring it out as they go.

So why not connect with them and learn from each other's successes and failures? At Lifestar, we're creating a one person business community where you can go to meet and get advice from other solopreneurs. Be sure to join in on the conversations at community.lifestar.com. That's community.lifestarwith2r's.com.